Another Good Day
It had been another good day. For a little over two weeks now, the demolition work at the hospital and the flood of construction workers had practically halved the number of parking spaces inside the grounds. So I did what any self respecting, civically minded parking enforcement officer would do and started booking every car illegally parked around the nearby estate and side streets.
The thing is, when I told Jenny, she wasn’t quite as thrilled.
Being a natural empath, I’m quick to pick up on emotions and all that.
“I guess you’re pretty proud of yourself, Matt.”
“Well yeah, I am actually. Weeks like this mean bonuses, and bonuses get us closer to the house deposit. What’s the problem?”
“You are. Or rather that bloody job of yours. Do you really have to take so much pride in it?”
“Well yes, of course I take pride in my work. If it weren’t for us wardens… erm, enforcement officers, roads would be gridlocked and half the town wouldn’t be safe to cross. There’s a school at the top of that estate, you know.”
“That’s your go to defence every time, isn’t it? ‘Just doing my duty. Just following orders.’ You take the job so literally you didn’t even notice you’d booked my car.”
“Well of course I recognised your car, but you can’t blame me for your parking illegally, can you? If you hadn’t done that, there wouldn’t be an issue, would there?”
“Oh, you…”
It was around then that I began to suspect I may have prodded the bear. Looking back, the throbbing veins in her temples were probably the clearest indicator, though the look of thunder settling into her face certainly helped.
So, hastily, I produced her kryptonite. A still warm meat and potato pie from Hardacres.
Even mid rage, her eyes registered the peace offering before her brain did, leaving her mouth opening and closing silently on its own. Within moments, the beast would be subdued for at least ten minutes.
I seized the moment and relaxed back into my favourite armchair, kicked off my shoes, wriggled my toes, and breathed a long sigh of relief while mentally mapping tomorrow’s route. I decided I’d start nearer the school. Parents were always careless under pressure.